A quiet morning moment...

I heard a scream this morning coming from the nursery, a scared little boy crying, "Mama!"  My first thought when he wakes up in the middle of the night is, "Please go back to sleep while mommy is still sleepy enough to also go back to sleep!"  As I picked him up and wiped away the alligator tears, I took a deep whiff of that oh-so-good sleepy baby smell.  I'm not sure what woke him up or why he was so upset, but mommy was here to make it better.  That is one of the best things about motherhood, is that no matter the problem or boo boo, mommy always makes it better.  That's why waking up while it is still dark, which AJ and I do not do, is OK once in awhile.  At first I thought it was 7ish, and I resigned myself to being awake for the day.  We snuggled into the rocking chair to cuddle for a bit, with the hope that he would fall back asleep, and therefor mommy could go back to bed also.  He sighed and nuzzled into my shoulder, with that entire-body relaxing limpness that babies do.  I knew it would take a while for him to be asleep enough for me to put him down.  I settled in and listened to Kanye West Rock-a-Bye baby, my mind starting to work for the day.

I was actually kind of grateful that he needed his mommy this morning for  a few reasons.  1.  He has been super active and independent lately, so the only wants snuggles if he's sick or sleeping. 2. He stopped nursing 2 weeks ago, and it has been kinda hard for me.  We don't have that special bond thats just between us.  I feel like I can't do anything different than anyone else can now, and I actually cried when I realized that I had nursed him for the last time. So it was nice to just sit in the dark quiet and reflect on my little baby, who is growing up so fast.  Well, I kinda thought that it was still pretty dark out for being 7ish, then I realized that it was actually 6, because we still haven't changed his clock back from daylight savings.  I was pretty happy about a potential hour more of sleep.

 He was out by then, so we just went and climbed back into my bed.  He doesn't sleep with us very often, I don't really believe in co-sleeping, but once in awhile we make an exception.  I do not actually sleep very well with him in bed with us, I just worry about him falling off, or something, so it's not very restful for me.  He was asleep on my arm, so I just laid there in wonder of his sweetness.  We dozed for a bit until he suddenly sat up, smacked Dave on the face and said, "Dada!"  I guess it was time to be up.  :)  I am currently a little jealous of AJ, who went to bed at 7:30, and I wish I could have as well, but I'll head there soon, as I'm sure he'll be up early again tomorrow.  Hopefully it'll be his normal happy chatter and smile that I wake up to.  I prefer that to crying babies.